Shannon!

Means: Shy, Little, Wise, Owl, Ancient

Upset about a good day?

As good as a day good be (by day i mean heavly stressful high school day), today was not bad. I had two presentations and an exam to do, but they all went okay (pretty sure i passed at least!). After this, i did my normal activities, even met a new friend "Amber". Had an awesome day at work - i like students who are pretty hot and enjoy learning at the same time (<-- best part about tutoring!). so... en somme, today wasn't bad... so, why do i feel so sad? I can't explain the feeling, but i only feel like sad songs today, and i don't want to do anything i normally love to do. Don't understand myself today, explained emotions... I swear i am not a moody person, but i was happy up until an hour ago. What does this mean? Have i perhaps been thinking to much about the end of school? Is this the cause of sadness and other strong emotions? Back in elementary school, i was the only girl who never cried on the last day, when we knew we were never comming back. I had emotions, but i cannot show them - i don't even try to hold them back, they just don't show! I don't even force them. I seem like a bubbly blonde - am i so afraid of my image that i can't cry? Why don't i cry a lot? I mean, i cry when i am hurt (physically) but i can only remember a few moments where i truely cried. There was this one time i cried for attention, or at least it started out that way, just b/c i was sad about one thing, but then half way through, the acting stopped and i was being real. That's another fact about crying, it's hard to stop and it usually turns real if it's intentions were not.

Ick. That is a lot of free style writting. All truth though. I jump ideas a lot and write what i think, however it does help me discovers my thoughts. Reading what i think, and thinking what i think are quite different due to the fact that it always seems to be more real when i read it.

Maintenant, je vais commencer d'écrire dans une autre idioma. Sí, hablo tres idiomas pero mi español es horrible. Donc je vais continuer ou je suis confortable. Il y exciste une sorte de rasurance en savant qu'il n'y a pas beaucoup de personnes qui vont comprendre tous de ce que j'écrit. Peut-être un jour je vous écrirai une poème à propos de ma souffrance. Ma pauvre coeur - il ne fonctionne pas. Il n'a jamais fonctionner car j'ai jamais senti l'amour. J'ai trops peur. Je n'aime personne. Amour de famille est différent car il faut les aimer, je ne peut pas décider ceci, mais l'amour pour quelqu'un d'autre n'existe pas pour moi. Serai-je toujours comme ceci? No sé pero es probable. Soy une habladora que quiere dormir - donc il faut que j'aille. Salut! Hasta la proxima.

Until the next time, it's shannyn signing out - Póg mo thoin!

Having Fun At Quizilla(.com)

What type of killer am I?
A Samurai
"You are full of honour and value respect. You are not really the stereotypical hero, but you do fight for good. Just in your own way. For you, it is most certainly okay to kill an evil person, if it is for justice and peace. You also don't belive in mourning all the time and think that once you've hit a bad stage in life you just have to get up again. It's pointless to concentrate on emotional pain and better to just get on with everything. You also are a down to earth type of person and think before you act. Impulsive people may annoy you somewhat."


Which of the Greek Gods are you?
Morpheus
"You are like the Greek God Morpheus, of dreams. Believing there is something bigger out there, and often lost in thought. You're imaginitive and smart - but not always a leader, but usually the one that comes up with the plan. You often ask, What if... and long to get out of the darkness and through the window."


What type of teenager are you?
Regular
"You are the 'regular' teen. Don't worry, alot of people will get this result. However, you set pretty high/low goals for yourself...and you believe you are the only one in the world. But, there are alot of people with your attitude. You tend to wear regular clothing, or you are forced to wear colors you don't want to. (such as your mother always buying you pink / blue clothing) Sometimes you feel horribly lonely and want to hide, but as always, you find something to give you reason to continue. You can either hate or love school, one opinion please. Never fear, you are not one of a kind...and that is kinda nice to hear, since there are other teenagers out there with your exact view on life. "

"You could get a job as an author, Teacher, editor, architect, buisness owner, or administrator. Good luck in life, and don't forget that no one is ever alone. "


You are beautiful.... but why?
Innocent and Childlike
"You are beautiful because of the pure, sensitive, good hearted, unexperienced vibe you give out. You most likely haven't done much such as sex, drugs , and alcohol. If you have you were probably just experimenting out of pure curiousity. Your curiousness may lead to danger if you cannot control it! People like to be around you because of your young personality. You like to have fun and be happy. You are well liked by most people but some may find you slightly immature. Don't let people bring you down, for you are a wonderful and beautiful person!"

Not Thinking About The "E" Word!

Exams. That's right! It's that time of year again. Anyways, i would rather rant about the BBQ I was at last night. As usual, my bro and i formed a sub party. We didn't know many ppl because they were all friends of the family or distant relations over the age of 30 (at least! some were over 90!!!). The youngest was a one year old baby and a three week old puppy. Needless to say, the puppy (Darci) was ADORABLE!!!!! After those two were my bro and I followed by my cousin who is in his thirties - hence i was alone! So anyways. My bro and i get a long pretty well, so he talked by ourselves most of the night, when people where not coming up to me and wishing me luck next year at university. The highlight of course was pretty f'-in sweet! My gramma has apparently been saving a ring for me since i was born. Let me add, it's not just a ring. It's got 8 diamonds, 8 saphires and it's gold!! (VERY EXPENSIVES!!!!) and it has to be at least 30 years old!!! I'm actually afraid to where this thing!! Anyways, it was suppose to be for my 18th b-day but instead i got it for my grad because i will be at uni by then...

g2g. BIES! - Shannon

A little lesson in Gaelic

While in Ireland last summer i learned this neat and helpful little phrase: "póg mo thón". I saw it on a t-shirt with a pic of Bart Simpson bending over, showing his butt. I'm sure you can just guess what it means, or at least that it's not the best phrase. So, back to my story: This is actually scottish gaelic, not irish gaelic, so let me tell you how to say it the true irish way: "póg mo thoin"! While doing this "research" i descovered another term "spalpeen" which means 'irresponsible fool'. (i can think of a few ppl) although it may also mean 'scamp'. Finally, this one i already knew before my trip: "céad míle fáilte ", which means 'a hundred thousand welcomes'. - to pronounce that: ' Kay-d mill-uh fault-chuch'.

Hope you learned a lot today.
Shannon

P.S. The show last night at my school was really good. R.P. was sooo amazing. I asked my bro who had the best singing voice and he said you. Everyone else was super good too, but you couldn't hear them sometimes cuz da music was loud. Congrats to all.

Girls Don't Like Boys, Girls Like Cars And Money

Giggle. Boys are great, but so are cars and money. I have a car, and i have some money (although i'm still quite poor), having a boy would be great. And, as per the song, i don't think i would abuse him that badly. I could pay for my own things, and be funny! Actually, aren't i funny?. .. in a sort of sarcastic way at least? Giggle. do do do... "boys will laugh at girls when they aren't funny..." Ever since prom i have been addicted to this game. See that's the weird thing about me, i play a song over and over and over again until i just get sick of it. It's on it's 20th or so round right now... i usually don't get sick of a song till the 115th round of the song. Although "scars" by Papa Roach lasted at least twice as long as that. I was royally addicted to that for weeks. ....and these girls like these boys, and these boys like these girls.... giggle. boys. and car. and money.

Shannon

P.S. Am i losing my soul through the material world?

Shopping

Picture of my shopping trip after prom,
I look so sleepy!

Again

okay, sorry I had to leave so fast last time. It always seems that as soon as i start writing stuff down, that someone will come in and interupt me. It's just not fair! Anyways... as I was saying last time, prom was sooo much fun, i have all my pictures in my msn space, it seems simplar there; although that does mean that you actually have to have my msn to see them. OH wells, let me just explain it as grafically as i can: My hair was up, and i had a few light curls comming down from it. My dress was stapless and a light pink. Everyone looked soooo nice. For once they had some pretty good music (I LOVE GREEN DAY!!!), and everyone danced a lot. Sadly us girls had evil shoes that made it hard to dance all night, so most ppl took of their shoes that danced like hicks. I on the other hand did not (ironic b/c i live in the most hickiest down around and they all live near the city!).

OMG! I don't want to do my homework!!!!!! I am totally procrastinating about it. Sure it's not due untill tuesday but i just want it over with, and i can't find enough information to finish it. EVIL EVIL!!! A thousand curses on my teacher who assigned it! I still can't believe that i have to go to school 2mora, it was such a comfortably long weekend. *tears* only 18 days till i am finished all my exams and school is over for me. Of course i still have grad night to look forward to... but basically i'm still quite sad. High school really is some of the best years of your life.

Prom and the Next Day

WOW! prom was awesome. to all those people who didn't go because they didn't have anyone to go with - well i didn't go with anyone, that just goes to show you that you can still have so much fun without a date - and to all those people who thought it would not be fun - hanging out with your friends, when everyone is complementing you, is fun. I pity you -.

After Prom, ALY came over and slept in my basement. When we woke up the next day, we went shopping far away in maple with jenny, jenny, janet & sharon. fun fun. the best part was the no schoolness. SWEET! I bought a new shirt. I plan to wear it on saturday.

LATERS!

Drinking a PEPSI

Song: Treble Charger - American Psycho
From my title i'm sure you can guess what i am doing right now. giggle.
Today was awesome. I only had 120 minutes of class. Then i went to a fair at my school, where Tackie killed me in one of the games. I bought a FREEZIE there. It was blue. I have blue clothes ont today. And my pepsi can is blue. Therefore: I am blue.

Anyways, after i left the fair, Tackie, Sharon and Jenny went to an animal farm where we got to look at farm animals (GOSH!). Sharon is evil. Jenny is funny. We saw birds, donkies, sheep, ponies, and rabbits. There were other stuff, but thoses were the highlights.

I drove Tackie back to school and Sharon to her house. Then Jenny and i played a round of ten pin bowling. She won. By a lot. (giggle!) Then we went shopping for prom stuff. She got a few things, but i got nothing. Then i drove her home.

Right now i am mad at my parents. My daddy is sick, but my mom is guilt-triping me about it. I wanted to play a game. I NEVER get my way (*cough*cough*). Either way, i ate pizza tonight, and during our trip to the farm, i bought some strawberry ice cream. Stawberry is my new fav. flavor, b/c it's as sweet as I. giggle.

Sick ... but happy.... but not

Okay, this weekend totally sucked. I have beeb sick since thursday night - flu. gross gross. Don't worry, i don't plan on giving you the nasty details. Let me just say that it was the the most sick i have been in a very long time. I blaim my bro for it, he got it first!!!!

Anyways, prom is comming up. This makes me happy. Even though i am super weak, i went shopping with my mom today and we bought myself a prom dress (pink and long!) and a new purse (white!). The happiness comes from the crappy limo arrangements we have. I feel like no matter what we do, it is going to hurt somebody. Personally i would like to have it just the girls in the limo so that i don't have to exclud any of my friends - but bfs make it so much more complex. Damnation!!

I may or may not continue this later.
too angry now

Yesterday = Shopping Fun

Yesterday was très fun. After buying really pretty jewelery... (tons of earings and a butterfly necklace for me), Sharon, Celia and I drove down to SC mall. Sadly we didn't buy any new clothes, but Sharon tried on four dresses for prom. I still say the first one looked amazing on her. She tried to get Celia and I to try some on but we were stubborn. Both of then tried on a million shoes, but i have big feet and couldn't bother.

Two days ago i cut my hair much shorter and died it blonder. Although both S + C noticed yesterday, when i went to church today, nobody said anything. painful. I'm sure that nobody noticed, which normally would have been fine with any regular haircut, but let me tell you, my hair is really really bright right now. I think that it's very obvious that i colored it. So.... somebody should have said something. painful.

Soo much work to do!!!! Allez-vous en!

The old me, The new me...

Let me make this clear. I used to be a bi.ch, I mean full out. I was a clothes obsested person! I cared so much about what people thought of me, but on the other hand i would yell and curse at them whenever i felt like it. I had no respect for anyone or anything, and my grades were terrible. I could not keep any secrets, but i had some pretty close friends. Let me say that i was a level B not too long ago. I would have done anything to become and A, and let me say that i did do a lot of things that i am not proud of now. (sorry to everyone about that hate mail...). All those mean jokes, and talks about people behind their backs... I don't understand how you ever forgave me.

That was the old me. Then came the next stage of life. I became a C. My grades got better, but i had lost a lot of friends. Although i became really tight with those friends that I had, i really wasn't happy. Now that we are in high school, and the letter system is a little different; i don't know where I stand.

Who am I, and where do I stand? I'm so confussed.

Compliments

I don't know what to write. I have so much work to do this weekend <-- this fact can't be stressed enough. To solve this problem, I'm just going to write in point form so that i don't need to make actually paragraphs...

• I went shopping with my friend today. I missed her.
• I have to work tonight. No pay.
• "FEJ" is still cute, but there can never be anything that comes from this. It's a fact that I don't actually like him - this doesn't change his cute level.
• I was complimented today by the most unlikely of people. (Hence the title).
• My brother stole his MD back. I am currently music-less.
• Dinner party (AGAIN!) 2mora. Rachel and Jason are comming. They're cool.
• Accepted to two 'u's - early

Well, work soon. BIES!!!

Bite Me

I have to work tonight. Bite Me. I have to work (for my church) for the next three days. Bite Me. I have two projects, and a test next week. Bite Me. I told off one of the only people who ever really looked up to me and thought i was cool. Bite Me. I just realized i'm over the guy i liked for several (literally!) years. Bite Me. I have started talking about ppl behind their backs. Bite Me.

BITE ME!

So not me...

It's not like me to forget something, in fact i so rarely forget something that my parents say i have a memory like an elephant b/c "an elephant never forgets". Wow! By that sentence i totally sound like a little kid. Anyways, today i forgot some of my homework at school (shocking!) - my point is that that is not like me at all. It's actually very rare for me and i feel really empty because of it.
So, guess what i did about this montrous problem... I went and e-mailed my teacher. Wow! Now i sound like a total nerd! - Apart from what i sound like, i'm actually sad that i forgot my work, and i'm scared of getting in trouble 2mora. - just meet my teacher and maybe that last part can be justified for me.

I feel like breaking down (not just for the reason above). I don't actually know why. Pourquoi es-ce que je trouve l'explication de mes idées si difficile? Pourquoi trouve-je que c'est imposible de communiqué mes problèmes? No sé. (that last part is Spanish, incase you are trying to look the word up in a french dictionnary).

So, yesterday was a snow/ice day and they closed down all the buses. Needless to say, i drove anyways and stayed at school despite the fact above. 67% of my classes had less than 55% of the students in attendance. That's a weird fact, but what angers me is that i believed that I had to stay at school, despite this, and my brother got to go home. Little fils de putain! Je vais lui tuer un de ces jours! (pas vraiment, mais vous savez ce que je veut dire [j'espère]). It's not fair that he was allowed to go home, when i had to suffer through pointless busy activities. Je suis fâché.

Another thing about yesterday was that it was V- day. That was annoying. Une de mes plus grande désire est d'être plus amical avec le nouveau garçon à l'école. Vous savez à qui je pense. Ayuadame por favor!

"Where she belongs is not here! But there is no place for her to go."

Dracula has come to suck your blood!!!!

Read the title and you will know which book I am currently reading. I don't understand why "dracula" isn't a very popular book, b/c i really like it. It's full of suspence and in general, it's very well written. I just don't understand why not yet Oprah's fav. jokes, i never watch that show.

Anyways, it's a new semester for me, and, with a limited number of shocks from "the real world", I think it will be a half descent semester. Much more work than the previous, but mark wise, my strengths are all here. Well, as many of you know, a new semester often brings new kids to a school. Let me annonce, here and now for all to hear, that the new kid (let's call him "Fej") it's a hottie. Not only does he have the whole european look about him, which my school seriously lacks, but, he is down to earth and i have already embarrased him. Personally, i don't think that yelling "BYE FEJ!!!!!!! across the caf. is a big deal, but this is high school. Meaning that the rumour mill has already begun and i will get a beautiful but lengthy report about the situation on Monday. Since we all know that high school is about remembering all the bad/stupide things that you have done in your life. not jokes.

Have a descent 'mester ppl

Good Mood (with rewards)

Today i woke up after the best sleep i ever had! You know that feeling when you're like "wow! that was awesome" ??!!?!? Well, no matter, it was a nice long sleep...
Finally first semester is over! It was not good mostly because Math was so depressing. I think i did well in french and Soc. since i never had many probs with them all semester, but i'm like totally failing math so i'm really depressed about it. Although, it's over now and i never need to think about it again!!!! - at least not until report cards come out, in a few weeks. I'll probably cry when i get them. (I'm not usually this mark obesses - like some ppl).
Right now i'm listening to "American Pie" (the Madonna version). It's good - such a classic! "the day the music died... we started singin' - bye bye miss american pie...." "THIS WILL BE THE DAY THAT I DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" <-- not litterally ppl!! Some ppl might believe too much. Remember, today was good. Why, you might ask... well, let me tell you why... I went shopping, and bought:

1. New jean jacket ($30)
2. Pens (purple, pink, light blue) ($5)
3. Hot pink underwear x3 ($20)
4. Lunch / snack ($6)
5. A little doggie toy for my dog ($5)

Surprisingly, that is a lot for me. I never buy lots of stuff and splurge that much! Maybe it's my new job that's doing this to me. - Which reminds me - the one thing that is going to make this day less cool is that i have to go to work... :(

BIES!! "Bye bye miss american pie"

Be Nice

Not the ppl should be nice. I just hope that this web site will be nice to me today. Yesterday you may have noticed that my post was doubly-posted. Know idea why, but that's why i'm asking it to be nice now, so that it will not screw up on me again.

Nyhoo, the unimportance of life was revealed. Next i feel the need to discuss the insults i heard today towards mes vêtements. C'est méchant de dire que vous n'aimez pas les habilles des autres devant eux. Notez s'il-vous-plaît que je n'est jamais fait cela d'une façon aussi méchant que j'ai entendu aujourd'hui. Peut-être j'ai dit que quelque chose aux passé, quand j'était une très différente personne. Maintenant je senterai trop triste après avoir dit des choses de mêmes. Croyez moi que cela me donne des difficultés depuis que je suis une personne qui regarde toujours les vêtements des autres personnes. Néamoins, je trouve que c'est méchant quand une group de personnes disent qu'ils n'aiment pas votre habille. Horrible.

I found that it is much harder to express myself in french, yet it's easier b/c i feel safer since i assume that people who aren't as fluent will have to look up a few words to understand the real meaning behind this whole thing. DEAL WITH IT.

Buenos noches!!

Latest News

Well, I can officially say that I did nothing over the winter break. I have a growing suspicion that I actually have many less friends that I previously thought. I used to believe that I was the only one playing the game of being nice to people and pretending to be their friend. Apparently not. I know that I do have some friends; those people who stuck beside me and called me once of twice during the break. To them, I honestly think highly of you! For those who didn’t and probably where not even thinking of me, yet I consider you a friend, shame on you! You have been caught. Hypercritical of me, maybe, but it hurts that I think of you as a good friend of mine but we never talk as soon as I don’t see you every day. What’s the deal with that?!?!?! Well, I would appreciate knowing the truth. If you are indeed playing the game I have played many times and am still playing, please tell me so I can have a bit of closure. You may have caught that last thing I said. Well, it’s true that I do play this so called game of friends, but only b/c I fear telling you that you suck, perhaps being your friend is easier than telling you the truth. Please don’t feel that way about myself, I will not get mad if you say that we should not be friends anymore. Wouldn’t it be nice if the people I play friendship games with were to come up and tell me this? That would only happen in a perfect world. In all likelihood, the people I thought I could trust to stand by my side will reveal there dirty little secrets. I admit here that I will be hurt, but I do believe that in situations such as this one, it’s better I know. Thank you for considering this request.

Maybe or maybe not your friend - Shannyn